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Posts Tagged ‘the law of attraction’

Last Sunday I beat up the world. I was angry for no apparent reason. I beat up my clients. I beat up Wendy, my coworker and friend, I beat up Bryan and everyone else. Bam. Bam. Bam.

Monday morning I woke up with a neck injury. The world beat me back; it didn’t take the Law of Attraction long to give me back what I put out.

I’ve been treating it with chiropractic care, massage, and more importantly on straightening out my attitude.
I think I’ve been feeling fear. I know how to deal with this; through my meditation and yoga.

Thing is I’ve been working so hard that I haven’t focused on any it like I want to. So, I need to take stock and give time to myself.

I am, however, so grateful for the work. My paycheck for graphics this month will be quite large. Lots of money is yea, yea, yea.

Balance is key for me. So, tomorrow..NO work, and all beach.

Damn, I love living in Southern California sometimes.

Namaste.

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What do I write when everything is going well? They always say that drama and tragedy fuels creativity. Well, screw that. I’m not having things turn to shit again so I can get creative. Looks like I need to take this experiment to another level, and push myself out of the complacency I feel with meditation and yoga. Why not commit more?

Yeah, like actually order the Self-Realization Fellowship lessons again, or start meditating in a group setting, at least once in a while. Reach out into the world a little more and teach what I know, or take a new class. Cheryl had told me to start learning something new, that it would help cement changes I’m trying to make in my brain, and I think it’s time. Maybe another screenplay class, a writing group, or even learn new software for editing or even Adobe Illustrator. The idea of a writing group kinda sounds thrilling though I’m not sure I’d be learning anything new. A photography class would be great.

But you see what I’m getting at. Complacency is boring. There is so much to do in life. How can anyone ever get bored? Oh yeah, they’re complacent. Well, not me! No way. Now, the thing that I have to figure out is how to not be complacent but still give myself kudos for what I do.

Ah, shit. I’m thinking way too much about all of this.

I think I’ll meditate.

Namaste.

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161 days to drastically change your life. That’s how long it took. Okay, I don’t have the castle in Scotland yet or the dog named Chummy, but signing a 6 month graphic design and video production contract with a company poised to be a major world-wide corporate entity is a major step in the right direction. Yah, that’s what we did tonight. It’s been hard work, some fourteen hour days, but it’s worth it.

And last Sept 20, when I started this Triple Goddess Experiment, I had quit my major source of income, a job I drastically hated, and worked part-time caring for my friend’s daughter. I took slack and judgment from friends and non-friends for the bold move I made, but I just knew I needed to make room for my dreams to come into my life. Then, things got tough with that part-time job, and finances got even tougher. I was at times depressed and miserable, but I kept up the experiment. I meditated every day, practiced my yoga, and completed assignment after assignment from my coach, Cheryl Squiers of Become a Lotus. It has been the toughest thing I’ve ever done.

And I’m still doing it. Because this isn’t a fad or an experiment anymore, it’s a way of life. Although, there are days when I don’t get a chance to post a blog and days when I still struggle, I have drastically changed my thought patterns. Having success, of course, will help continue to snowball these positive thoughts into more positive thoughts.

I can see my dreams and a more concrete plan for achieving them more clearly. This website will have the kind of exposure designers can only dream of. It will open many doors for us. Our video production work will be up front and center on this homepage. The potential is huge, and this will help me really follow this direction in my career. Yeah, I still want to write and direct and make stories. I’ve taken the first giant step on this ladder towards that goal.

So, I’m keepin’ on keepin’ on. This blog’s for you Holly.

Namaste.

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7 months into my Triple Goddess Experiment, and I come back to something that my coach told me when I started-“If you are experiencing a lack of money, it is because you are blocking it.” I recognize the truth in this as I recognize that this pertains to all things, not just money.

I felt tired this morning, exhausted even, and when I took a moment to meditate, it became apparent to me that I’d been blocking my connection to God. For example, imagine our connection to God is a highway. My highway to God has been a one way road, and I’ve been buying my thoughts and desires a one-way ticket down that road sending them to God. Putting the little mind in the big mind and all that. One road out of my mind with no way into it. Energy from God cannot enter into me if there is no road for it to travel. Nothing can; so, if I don’t either build another highway or turn the one that’s there into a two-way street, then I stay depleted. I need to receive and let the big mind enter into the little mind. I must work on a connection to God that goes both ways. I’ve always been a better giver than receiver, but to truly experience God, I must bring her and all she offers into my life. I must learn to receive ALL that she has to offer.

So, I’ll be working on some visualizations of a beautiful path made of light and crystal that leads from God to me. I will see God’s greatest gifts passing along this path and entering into my Auric field, energy, and mind. I will see them filling me up, and I will express gratitude for them. So it is.

Namaste.

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It’s odd how working gives me a much greater sense of self-esteem. Actually, nix that. It’s incredible how much better I feel after working a job that expresses who I am.

The two words, artist and healer, are nouns that express two distinct aspects of myself. Through much hard work during the last four and a half months, I realize that I must express both of these aspects of myself to be truly happy. I started my new job yesterday as a massage therapist, and felt overwhelming joy knowing that I am helping these people feel better, whether it’s simply through relaxation or by helping their bodies heal. I left work with a little cash in my pocket, and I didn’t feel as if I had to sell my soul to get it. Leaving the bar was a correct step in healing my own life. Accepting work as a massage therapist again, is the correct step in helping to bring my life closer to how I envision it.

But what about my art? I have always loved the arts- theater, song, dance, painting, writing- but I never knew, really knew what I wanted to do with this passion. My mother always encouraged me to pursue the arts because I loved it, which is reason enough, I suppose, for most people, but I always felt that there was something missing for me in this reasoning. I never felt it was expressing the entirety of who I am.

I believe true art expresses the voice of the artist and elicits an emotion and change in the person who hears that voice. Reflecting on the last four and a half moths, I realize that my art is meant to heal. My greatest wish, then, is to integrate healing into my art. Commercial art is great- it helps pay the bills- but to heal through my art would be profound. Although healing in itself is also an art, my desire is to ultimately heal through my writing, film, song, painting and dance.

Integrating these aspects of myself must be the purpose of my life. I know that know. Massaging and energy healing is a strong step in expressing who I am, but like commercial art, does not integrate these aspects. Each step I take in my future, then, will be to bring healing into my art.

This will be my greatest joy in my life. This is my impetus for all that I do.

This is my vision.

Namaste.

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Well, my coach, Cheryl Squiers, quit on me- but my mother, Cheryl Squiers, is back. I have mixed feelings about it. It was a big decision when I asked my mother, a Law of Attraction Teacher, Coach and Speaker, to coach me. We’ve had a past in which I always felt like I couldn’t live up to her expectations-she was the perfect stage mom. I become very guarded and defensive around her. She felt she wasn’t a good enough mother, according to me. And I felt I wasn’t a good enough daughter, according to her. Over the years, we have both worked on our selves, self-esteem, and tools to take care of ourselves. We learned to love ourselves, and since we loved ourselves, we were able to feel each other’s love. I felt that our relationship was finally to the point where I could listen to what she had to teach me.

The experiment was going great for several months, but eventually I started feeling like I was always talking to my coach and not my mother. I began missing her, and our conversations were tense until I finally realized what I was feeling…and I told her. My mother is so incredibly smart, caring, loving and just wonderful. She is a brilliant speaker, a caring coach and an inspiring teacher…but even though she is all of those wonderful things…a girl needs her mom. I needed my mom back. She took a look at how she was acting and felt like she couldn’t turn off the coach with me. She validated how I was feeling. So, she decided to stop coaching me.

So, now the question is, do I find another coach? Or do I coach myself. I have to meditate on this one. I am not sure.

As always, thanks for your support and listening.
Namaste.

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So how many of you feel like a failure when you “work” The Law of Attraction and all that you’ve focused on still doesn’t manifest in your life? Yeah, me, me, me, me, me. It’s been four months, and I’m still having crying breakdowns and little money in the bank. And what about you? Have you lost that weight yet or gotten that promotion? Have you attracted the love of your life?

Sometimes I think that aspects of The Law of Attraction give me more reason to blame myself for a crappy life. I feel more pressure to be a perfectionist and have it all together. Man, everyone can see how much I hate myself because I am not living my dreams. It’s all my fault I’m in this predicament. Does this ring true for any of you?

What I do love about The Law of Attraction is that it gives us our power back and God knows that we haven’t had power over our lives for a long time. Church and religion manipulated our very thoughts; oppression and fear will do that. You mean I can change my life? GOODY! The problem, however, is for those of us who are perfectionists and give it our all and are still coming up short. I give myself an A+ for effort, and a D on the mid-term, and I blame myself for all my misery, which makes me more miserable.

So what does this mean?

It means that the purpose in working The Law of Attraction isn’t to get all the shit you ever wanted. It isn’t to look at what you have attracted or not attracted as a measure of success. As a matter of fact, all that’s a bunch of bull shit. Judging yourself and being hard on yourself will simply take you further away from your true essence. The importance of working The Law of Attraction is that it allows you to have a better life along the way to your destination. There are several aspects of working The Law of Attraction that will help you be happier. Period.

Positive thinking and affirmations will shift your thinking. According to The Law of Attraction this will allow you to attract things in your life that match the energetic vibration of your thoughts. However, it will also allow you to enjoy the present moment. It is hard to be unhappy when you choose to think more positively. So, don’t do it for the future and what you will have. Do it for the NOW. That is all we have anyway. Further, when we think in a more positive way, we will react to any crap that does come our way in a manner that brings us more lightheartedness than heart ache. It is hard to react poorly when we are concentrating in a higher vibrational frequency. And if we do, oh well. Pick yourself up and try try again. We’re in school. We haven’t graduated to guru yet.

Grateful living that embodies the emotion of appreciation will tell the universe that you are abundant and full of wonderful things. This in turn will bring you MORE wonderful things. This is true according to The LOA. Straight up, living with gratitude will humble you and allow you to feel more connected to others. You will find that you will bring much joy to your relationships and they will flourish because people will feel valued. Living with gratitude fills your life with love.

As you start to think about what you do want in your life and work with all your gusto to attract it into your life with all the techniques I’ve talked about or others have shown you, you will come in contact with your passions and your true self. You will begin to focus on your greatest purpose. There is no time that you are closer to your true essence as when you are living your true purpose and expressing your honest self. Be prepared, however. It might not be what you thought it was. Be flexible to discover your truth. It is not an act of becoming that purpose, but in uncovering and revealing that true-self. This is the true beauty.

So, yes. I have been hard on myself for not attracting all that I want in my life yet. I know you are hard on yourself too. We usually are. But blame has no place in working with The Law of Attraction. Working it is not to attract that end desire.

Working The LOA is spiritual, pure and simple. And keep on, keepin on. It’s a way of life.

Namaste.

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